"Almost Over You" by Sheena Easton

HowYOUdoin, Dialophiles?

As we happily celebrate Valentines’ Day with our sweeties this weekend, we must remember and extend kindness and happy vibes to those who have recently lost a love, and haven’t yet made peace with that loss. If this describes you, you may feel that nobody understand what you are going through. However, we here at the Dial have it on good authority that Miss Sheena Easton understands your burden… so for all you lonely hearts out there… we offer her 1983 hit “Almost Over You”.

“I saw an old friend of ours today… she asked about you, I didn’t quite know what to say…”

A beautiful piano driven ballad, “Almost…” possesses a mature and classy sound, expertly detailing the pain of heartache due to an unfaithful partner, without crossing the line into “schmaltzy” territory. Even as a kid, I appreciated the lilting melody and harmony of this hit, which is no real surprise, given that Mom raised me on soft rock masters like The Carpenters and Barry Manilow. Her record collection allowed me to recognize and appreciate well-written and orchestrated pop ballads, and Sheena’s forgotten hit certainly fits that description.

A smash hit on the Adult Contemporary charts, where it placed at #4, “Almost...” had less of an impact on the Top 40, where it settled for a rather “meh” #25. Easton’s Best Kept Secret LP, from which “Almost” was extracted, did produce a big hit in the disco-influenced “Telefone (Long Distance Love Affair)”, a #9 Hot 100 smash.

“You’re such a sly one with your cold, cold heart… maybe leaving came easy, but it tore me apart…”

Easton enjoys the impressive distinction of being the first artist to earn top 5 singles on five different Billboard charts consecutively, those being the pop/hot 100, adult contemporary, country, dance, and R&B charts. She even, (and rather infamously), earned a slot on Tipper Gore and the PRC’s “Filthy Fifteen” list with her Prince-authored “Sugar Walls”. If that’s not a diverse range, I don’t know what is.

Although I never truly forgot this lovely track, it was made top of mind a few years ago when some friends informed me how petite Sheena throws an arcade game off a balcony in the video for this very song!  Being a huge fan of the 1980s arcade scene, and having never seen the video back in the day, (I didn’t have cable until the early 90s), I knew I had to watch this clip immediately.

Sure enough, as Sheena sings her heart out, in what is presumably her ex-boyfriend’s home, she passes by and interacts with two (now classic) arcade games, Defender, and Sinistar. The implication is that her man was too busy playing the games to spend time with her, thus provoking the ballad.

The Sinistar machine seen here is the real deal, a brand spanking-new 1983 release from Williams Electronics. However, the Defender machine, also by Williams, the very one heaved by Sheena “She Hulk” Easton over the side, is NOT an actual Defender machine, but most likely a prop cabinet created for the express purpose of destruction. Notice it is never seen actually powered on (unlike the Sinistar), and probably is just a wooden shell with no monitor or guts. (this would certainly make it easier to heave over a railing…)

“I can forgive you and soon I’ll forget all my shattered dreams… although you left me with nothing to show, full of misery…”

As much as I love this song, the video’s interpretation that Sheena lost her guy not to another woman, but to an arcade game, is unmistakably camp, and immediately pushes the video into WTF territory, not fitting the serious emotion of the song itself.

Are we supposed to interpret coming back around, after painting the town, to mean the guy was out racking up high scores? I always thought that meant he was romancing other ladies… (there’s an easy joke about “scoring” here, but I will exercise good judgment…)

Also, if Sinistar was the game that was put between himself and Sheena (as the guy’s reflection in its video screen would seem to indicate), why did she send the helpless Defender machine to the great arcade in the sky? This has to be the most egregious display of violence against an arcade cabinet in a music video since Tom Petty knocked over Astro Invader in his “You Got Lucky” video.

Bizarre video aside… Easton really sells this one, portraying an emotional wreck trying to get over the guy that neglected her. When she sings the final chorus repetition, I get goose bumps, every time.

So take a moment to listen to Sheena’s overlooked hit this Valentine’s Day, and see if you too catch those same goose bumps that we do here at the Dial, whether your weekend is filled with romance and roses or catching up on DVDs on your couch solo.

“Now I’m almost over you… I’ve almost shook these blues… So when you come back around, after painting the town, you’ll see I’m almost over you.”